We all know what to do. We just don’t know how to convince ourselves to do it.”
— Mel Robbins
How’s the New Year’s resolution going? Did you resolve to eat healthier, exercise more, save money?
Unfortunately, many have already abandoned their goals. According to US News, 80% of people have given up on their New Year’s resolutions by second week in February. That’s only 6 weeks into the new year!
Current society has programmed us to expect immediate results. Technology, customer service, GPS, Facebook, Alexa. All this has created an impatient lifestyle. When we don’t get the immediate results, we get discouraged and move on.
That’s why New Year’s resolutions are almost always destined to fail. We are only thinking about simple solutions to issues that are not so simple.
We need a different method to bring REAL change in our lives
For real change, you must think long-term, as a change in your identity. There has to be deep self-reflection to find the core of your discontentment. From this point, you can discover what led to your current state of discontentment, understand what keeps you there, and create a path to change it.
Sounds simple, right?
When your identity changes, it becomes a multi-year plan. And that’s when real magic and change happens.
I’ve got a buddy, Kevin. He became a long-distance runner a few years ago. Before then, he was a smoker and discontent with his health. His path to change started with self-discovery. He realized he loved adventure and big challenges. So, he decided to become a long-distance, off-road runner. His solution was not to just quit smoking. Instead, he created a lifestyle that didn’t allow smoking. He created new friends, new habitats, new routines. In his new life, there is no place for a smoker.
For Kevin, the reward is greater now! As he is now training for his next ultra-marathon, he knows completing an super long run in a rugged terrain is much more rewarding than a temporary rush from tobacco. He created a plan, created a new identity and solved his original discontentment.
Let’s be clear here – A change in identity is not just one massive jump from where you are to where you want to be. The change is committing to the person you want to be and start taking small steps to get there.
Much like in Kevin’s case. He didn’t stop smoking and run a 10k the next day. He just decided he wanted to be a runner and suffered through short, 2-mile runs. Over time he started adding more distance. He progressed to 3 miles, then 6, 13, 26, 50miles and so on. He enjoyed small wins to build up to bigger rewards.
If you are ready to plan out your change, check out the six tips below to get you started.
I challenge you to never set a New Year’s resolution again! Instead make a commitment to change your identify and you will be grateful you did.
]]>If you’re looking to make a change, then I say stop worrying about results and start worrying about your identity. Become the type of person who can achieve the things you want to achieve. Build the habit now. The results can come later.
James Clear
In the professional world, I consider myself a hard-charger. I’m always involved in something new and progressing on some type of challenge. I am always exploring different concepts, learning new technology and researching new investments. I’m always signing up for something new and taking on new commitments.
Recently, I’ve noticed something has been off. I found that I was becoming less motivated and less productive. Items on my to do list kept getting bumped down each day. It was an odd experience for procrastination to take such a priority. Even more, I had less drive to change it.
Becoming aware that the lack of motivation was a problem; I started to think back to the last time I was most productive, inspired and ready to take action. Then it hit me. It was when I returned from my last big trip.
That was the AH-HA moment! The answer was so obvious. I needed a break. Things were becoming too bland and I needed a jolt to my life. That’s when I planned a trip with a few buddies, which led to an early fall morning enjoying the view of colorful leaves from my hammock!
See, I want to live a BIG life. I want to make an impact on the world, give to charity, inspire others and leave a legacy. Yet to live a big life, one must grow to handle the responsibility of a BIG lifestyle. The constant drive, goal setting, accountability, networking, presentations.. it all becomes a burden at times.
One can’t just push forward without a periodic break to recharge. We need a REAL mental break to keep a big life going. I’ve realized that this type of break is often in the form of a trip, an escape, or best referenced as a “mini-break!”
A mini break is not quite a vacation, but it is definitely a selfish, no responsibility small break from the normal day-to-day routine. It is a great reminder to enjoy life, even when you are in grind mode! A mini break will help boost creativity, allow opportunity to find focus and re-energize.
You can create your own version of a mini break. However, I recommend a mini break follow these characteristics:
From this point on, I will be be purposeful with my mini breaks by scheduling every 3-4 months. This is the timeframe when I start to get overwhelmed and productivity starts to slack.
What do you do to recharge?
]]>“When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”
Previous President and COO at Waffle House Inc., Bert Thornton, presented his 10 Basic Laws of Success to the Gulf Breeze Rotary a few weeks ago. These laws can serve as guidelines for continual growth in your career and life.
Bert speaks from his 40 years of experience of progressive growth, as he experienced Waffle House grow from a few southern restaurants to an iconic national presence. Bert frequently speaks on leadership and is the author of “Find an Old Gorilla: Pathways Through the Jungle of Business and Life.”
1. Always take notes (always keep pen and paper)
Bert warns that your mind is always at work and you must find ways to make best use of it. It is impossible to always remember an idea. If you write it down, you have a better chance of remembering it again later.
2. Hang around the right people
Your network is your most valuable asset and will provide either a positive influence or a negative influence. So, you should be proactive to ensure you allow the right people to have an influence on your life. Bert encourages you to be around people that: have things you want, do things that you want do to, and hold positions that you aspire to achieve. You should be around these individuals and listen.
Bert stresses the importance of finding a mentor for guidance. The greater the mentor is respected by peers, the greater chance of your success as a mentee.
Learn more about finding the RIGHT mentor.
3. Be honest
Honesty is the key to long term survival in business and life. You can find short term success being dishonest, but the truth will eventually always come out. In the end, it is easier to just be honest.
4. Keep a great attitude – Always
More than your car, house, appearance; your attitude is the single most observed thing about you. Having great attitude is a magnet for great experiences.
5. Get up earlier than your friends
Waking up early is a great routine to set yourself up for success. If you are in business, get up earlier than competition. Remember the saying, “the early bird gets the worm.”
Learn more about setting your morning routine.
6. Learn to say yes & learn to say no
Leaders set their own agenda that align with their goals. To follow their example, when you are asked do something that does not align with your goals, learn to say “NO!” If you say “yes” to something that does not align with your goals, you will make two people unhappy: yourself and the person you said “yes” to.
If you are asked for something that does align with you goals, then say “YES”. Bert warns to never just say “ok”. Go forward with a task with passion or just say “NO.”
7. Nourish yourself
Three important parts in need of proper nourishment:
8. Learn to manage time
All have same amount of time. By focusing on these three areas, you can be a better time manager:
Extra: Never underestimate the power of small things repeated frequently over long period of time.
9. Give away all credit – take all the blame
People who do this are called great leaders. People that do not are called great followers.
10. Give away anonymous things of value
Following this law will give you power and fulfillment.
In conclusion, Bert shares his driving motivation as the age-old adage: “When the student is ready, the teacher will appear.”
For an abbreviated version of Bert’s presentation, see the video below titled: CMO Talks: Basic Laws of Success with Bert Thornton
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Everyone wants success, but no one wants to put in the work!
I have a confession. When I work on really big projects, I work really hard when the project is new, I am learning and having fun. Then, when the project gets to about 80-90% of completion, it gets hard. Progress slows. It starts to feel like work and boring. The fun is gone and I lose interest.
That’s the magic moment when projects can fail. Yet failure is not an option for the readers of this blog.
I have found that the following actions keep me moving forward:
These are just a few thoughts about progress. I am currently working a project and that has started to slow and I have used all of these actions to keep progress moving forward. Feel free to share any additional ideas below in the comments.
]]>One of many life’s failures are people who don’t realize how close to success they were before giving up – Thomas Edison
“Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go.”
— T. S. Eliot
We all have goals. Either expressed in statements like “one day, I plan to …” or you actually have it written down as a goal, we all are working towards a dream.
Our goals are only as good as the action we put to support them. It is human nature to loose focus, cut corners and skip steps. However, these actions prevent us from achieving our goals and are avoidable. The magic component to stay on the path to success is accountability!
Accountability is easily accessible and comes in many forms! You can set up an accountability partner or a group of partners. The idea is to have someone keep you honest to your goals. Below are a few ideas and resources to find accountability partners:
Much like my recent article about finding the right mentor, it is vital that you find the right accountability group that meets your budget, communication style and commitment.
Like launching a rocket , the majority of the effort is in the first stage – getting started! Today is the day. It’s time to get stop thinking about “one day” and get started today.
]]>“A great mentor helps you achieve what seems impossible” – Mariela Dabbah
Dating back to the Ancient Greeks, there have always been mentor/mentee relationships. Closely related to apprenticeships, the knowledge and experience of the mentor is utilized to speed up the process for success. A great mentor is one that aligns with your values and pushes you beyond your comfort zone to achieve more and be more. There are many types of mentor relationships and mentors can be found in various ways. Although the mentorship is often the act of a successful person volunteering their time and attention, it is a two-way relationship where the mentee can provide return value.
Not only speeding up success, a mentor can help with times of failure. The proper mentor can help you recover from those failures or reduce the collateral damage as you work to fix a problem. You can leverage a mentor’s experience and guidance to help with planning so that many failures or mistakes can be avoided in the first place. In addition, the right mentor help you with creative approaches by providing alternative perspectives to problems you are facing.
While most think of a mentor as someone you know or meet with personally, there are actually mentorsship you can establish on a virtual basis. We can discuss these types of mentors as in-person and virtual.
In-person Mentor
The most common mentorship, in-person mentors, allow you direct access to an individual that you chose and has accepted the status of mentor in your life. This individual can be someone you respect in your career or place of employment (or anywhere).
Some think of a perfect mentor as one that is 10 steps ahead of you and someone that knows you personally already. However, do not let your network hold you back. If there is someone living the life that you want, try to get into their world. Then, evaluate them for potential mentorship relationship.
Virtual Mentor
On the complete other end of the spectrum is the concept of virtual mentorship. This concept was first introduced to me by the real estate legend, Pat Hiban, as he discussed the concept on his podcast, Real Estate Rockstars Radio. He shared his concept of a virtual mentor as someone that he studies and models their life, but he does not know personally. It is an amazing concept as it opens up the entire world of potential mentors. There is nearly an endless surplus of successful personalities and business leaders available. The best part is that many live their lives in alignment with this age of social media making it very easy to learn about a person’s life, how they found success and habits they create to continue the path of success. You can model your life and habits similar to that of a virtual mentor.
Now let’s focus on finding the RIGHT mentor. The first step is self analysis. You must understand what you want and who you want to be! This step is crucial, as it will define the best type of mentor for you and alleviate frustrations. Once you define the image of your future self, you can find someone that fits that model.
When profiling a mentor to align with the image of your future self, you will want to consider:
Places to find a mentor
Now we get to the point of this article and actually find a mentor. While these relationships happen by chance, you have better chances proactivly looking for mentor. Below are a few ideas of places to find a mentor.
While the mentor is volunteering their time/etc, there are many ways you can “pay” them back for their sacrifice. Mentors volunteer their time for many reaasons. Your job is to determine what that perpose is and help them out. In many times they just enjoy what they are doing – so brining them fulfilment in their efforrts is enought.
A few ways to share your graditude to your mentor include:
In conclusion, we all know finding a mentor is a good idea. However, many never take the initive to make it happen. If you are truly committed to your success, you will make it a priority this week. No excuses.
]]>Either you run the day or the day runs you! – Jim Rohn
One of the biggest challenges we all face is staying in control of our day. Far too often we end a long day exhausted with nothing really to show. We work hard, but in the end of the day often you can question – did this get me closer to my goal? If you didn’t start the day right, then the answer is usually “no”.
One way to ensure you stay in control of your day is to start it correctly. If you wake up to a buzzing alarm clock, stumble out of bed, get ready and leave for work; then you have already lost control of your day.
Owning your day, starts by waking up earlier to spend time alone to refine your purpose, set proper mindfulness and establish priorities for the day. You can accomplish this with set routines that you can easily run though in the morning hours. This process takes a bit of effort to get started, but makes a massive difference in the long run. There are countless leaders and successful entrepreneurs that recommend a good morning routine because of the benefits they experience.
The well known leadership speaker, Robin Sharma, has been a major promoter of a morning routine. He calls his concept the Holy Hour and even provides some tactics to help you get out of bed early.
The first step to get started is to adopt a proven routine. A few years ago, I was introduced to the book, “The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM)” by Hal Elrod. The book is the tells the story of his interest in finding common traits that successful people share. From his studies, he discovered the value each placed on their morning routine. Hal created a set of morning routines called the S.A.V.E.R.S (explained below). This simple routine can help you get organized with a solid morning strategy.
So, let me explain the S.A.V.E.R.S and share a few hacks that work for me.
(S) Silence
Morning meditation or prayer is a time of purposeful silence. If you are like most, your day runs at light speed. This time is to establish an optimal mindset that can guide your actions for the rest of the day. Many successful businessmen and celebrities claim that this daily time of clarity and self awareness helps them deal with stress of a high profile life.
I find great value in my morning meditation. For optimal organization to get into a meditation session, I have found the iPhone app, Calm, to be very helpful.
(A) Affirmations
Affirmations allow you to program your mind for optimism and success. We all have self doubt and limiting beliefs which make it vital to surround yourself with optimism. If we can believe in our actions, great things can happen. Henry Ford summed up the idea by the statement, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right either way.”
There are many ways to time hack daily review of affirmations. You can record affirmations to play while driving or just listen to recordings by others on YouTube. I have found that just simply writing my affirmations on a index card and repeating them 3 times each day is most effective.
(V) Visualizations
Visualizing is creating a mental image of what you really want. In the process you visualize exactly what you want to achieve or attain, then mentally rehearse what you will need to do to accomplish it. Keep only positive thoughts – where everything works out for you. Then think about after you achieve your goal.
For example: if you want to own an island; you would visualize yourself finding great success in what you are doing now. With this success, you would have great amounts of wealth or insider knowledge of gaining an island without money. You would visualize finding the prefect island. Then, imagine yourself owning the island – walking on the beach, looking at the waves, the sun glaring off the water, toes in the sand. You get the idea.
The actor, Jim Carrey, wrote a check to himself early in his career for 10 million dollars. He dated for 10 years in the future and added in the memo line, “For acting services rendered.” He then visualized it for years. Less than 10 years later, he made 10 million dollars for his starring role in Dumb and Dumber.
I find that early in the morning my mind tends to wander too much when I am trying to visualize. My hack is to write down the vision of success (with details of how I enjoy it) as the images pop in my mind.
(E) Exercise
A very simple workout will get your body in a positive mode and mentally prepared. Your brain soaks up 20% of the oxygen in your body. Cardio-focused workouts boosts blood flow to your brain delivering the essential oxygen to stimulate the important muscle. As a word of advice: Don’t overthink it. A simple set of jumping jacks, sit-ups or even a walk around the block will do the job and get your mind ready for the day.
I have experimented with several great apps, such as Seven and yoga videos on Youtube. However, I will primarily run or walk in my neighborhood because I love being outdoors.
( R) Read
Keep your mind active and thoughts progressing by reading every morning. If you really don’t like reading a book, then listen to an audiobook or consider a daily thought guide. You can even time hack by listening to an audiobook while you exercise.
I have found the greatest success reading something that is thought-provoking. I really enjoy Easwaran’s Thought for the Day app which provide a good variety of secular quotes or readings and bible verses with additional thoughts about how the message relates to our lives.
(S) Scribe
Journaling (or scribing) is the last step of the S.A.V.E.R.S. method. During this step, you are to write what is on your mind. This can include anything from thoughts to feeling to ideas. You can either us a blank notebook or use a daily journal guide like the Five Minute Journal.
I use a blank notebook to free flow thoughts and ideas what is on my mind. I also created my own guide that covers different mindsets that I want to cover such as gratefulness, daily priorities, thoughts of others and awareness of fears.
That’s the overview of the S.A.V.E.R.S. strategy. Many have found success with this strategy. Even the Author of Rich Dad Poor Dad, Robert Kiyosaki, claims that “I can always make another dollar, but I cannot make another day.’ If you want to maximize every day of your life, read The Miracle Morning.”
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